Normally I wouldnÂ’t tell you in depth any stories of stupidity but due to recent situations and circumstances, IÂ’ll tell you this one.

I work on part time contracts for a guy, who holds clients, when he needs me. Usually work involves network configuration cleanup, windows installations and other small items of task. Bitch-work if you will.

A long time ago in January we went to visit a new client and analyse the things they’d need done. To my dismay their network was a complete mess. Configured by a monkey, who didn’t know shit, using random IP addressing. Duplicate mappings of the same shares, slow over-loaded systems and a shared 28.8 dialup modem. While looking around I found keys for 10 Windows XP Professional licenses as paid for by them. Install Windows XP on Celeron 300’s? I don’t think so. Not to mention a ‘new’ server that didn’t even have anything installed on it yet. Egad.

I told them how long itÂ’d take, three or four weekends or Fridays and got to work. Omitting the XP installs of which I refused to do.

After a quick day or two the network was sorted out, the new server configured and running happily. I removed the 14 different viral infections that were on their network. I also was kind enough to hook up my very own 56k modem to help them a bit. Then they asked about the high speed internet. What? What high speed internet? The modem in a box, under the desk, is such a nice place for it. HereÂ’s where the fun kicks in.

Apparently the new server that I had just configured was supposed to have been installed the previous August. Over five months ago. At that time the high speed internet was also ordered and “installed.” This is hilarious, at this point I’m trying not to laugh very hard because these people have been paying for high speed for five months and using a 28.8 modem. But it gets better. Their high speed account only allowed them 10 hours of dialup per month. An auto-dialling modem will be connected pretty much all day during office hours (as this one was configured to do so), so these people were also paying, on top of their high speed, overage for dialling up past the 10 allotted hours.

I hooked up the high speed, it didnÂ’t work. A few more weeks pass and after playing a few rounds of tennis with the technical support of said unnamed provider, they finally caved in and said theyÂ’ll send a technician out to verify the line is correct. Not today though, next week. A week later after finding out the phone line was never properly configured for the high speed, it was working. Did said unnamed provider claim responsibility for failing to install things properly? No, but that wasnÂ’t my problem anyways. I wasnÂ’t the one paying for five, now six months.

The real kick to the high speed is that since the phone man came in to verify (and fix) the line, I had never been back. The person I work for had been a few times, but I have no idea of the on-goings. But I can probably tell you this; the high speed still wasnÂ’t being used. And nobody knew the difference.

I can tell you one thing though; their network had never been so smooth. Smooth enough for them to not call again for more work. Or were they just being stubborn again like they were before? That is most likely the answer. DonÂ’t get me wrong, I was proud of the work I had done.

TheyÂ’re going out of business now. Not surprising in the least. After the poor management I had seen in my short stint of doing network repairs, I wondered how they were in business at all. I pity the foo.