Funk. That's probably the best way to describe how I've been feeling lately. Yes, the past couple of years I've tried to avoid bitching and complaining so much on this site but I feel I must. I am in a funk. Well, my life has reached a point where I feel as though it is devoid of excitement, and really much of anything...despite the occasional loss of a soccer game and the endless reading of Greek, Latin, and books on the Roman army, frontiers, and logistics. Admittedly, the thesis work, particularly if the author has done his/her hw and written well, then that's okay because I really enjoy the work. Hell, though the soccer seems to be sucking some of the life out of me (I'm having my best season ever yet we don't win), it's those blocks of time outside of school, soccer, and the gym, as well as the scenery that are leaving me dreary.

Many of my closest friends are nearing that next stage of their life which Linc has just discussed. For those friends (and family soon enough) I am very happy. In fact, within my close circle of trusted friends that number is about to jump from 0 - a whole bunch in the next year or two. However, the jealousy and all that crap has kicked in as although I'm in no rush to get married and to be honest seem to have given up on even looking for a gf, I still feel like those friends are moving on to that next stage while I'm stuck...actually...that's just it. I'm not sure where I am stuck...Brnantford aside.

So, this much I know. I am a restless spirit who longs to get lost in large city...or perhaps a new country. God knows if I can hold out until next summer I'll be okay. I know that Roman history is still the thing for me - I can't think of anything else that I'd rather do. But, even if I do make it off to some exciting place (even TO) for my PhD and get out of Brantford (high on the priority list) and away from this awful automobile dependance, I still think that I may feel this way. ACtually...I don't know what else to say. I just feel blah. And...I don't think that this strongbow and the Matthew Good in the background are helping.

Oh. I guess I also know that I am somewhat of a restless spirit. I hate to be in the same place for too long, particularly a place like this where I've gotten in the habit of not getting out really at all because I'm unsatisfied with the extraciricular activities and the same old shit that goes on at these places anyway. I WANT SOMETHING MORE!!! AH!!!!!!!!!!

Okay I'm done.